The 4 F’s: Fight, Flight, Freeze, Fawn

Our body and mind has an instinctive way of responding to stress, fear or danger in a way to protect us. Known as the 4 F’s, these are the fight, flight, freeze, and fawn response, and they can persist long after the threat has passed. The 4 F’s are deeply tied to the brain’s center for processing fear and emotional reactions (the amygdala), and are regulated by the autonomic nervous system. When we encounter a perceived threat, the amygdala triggers these survival responses before the rational brain (prefrontal cortex) has time to respond.

For trauma survivors, the brain can remain in a hyper-alert state and even stuck in one of these 4 responses as a coping mechanism. You may be stuck in one of the 4 F’s without realizing it.

What Are the 4 F’s?

The 4 F’s are mediated by the autonomic nervous system, which handles our nervous system’s automatic reactions when we sense danger, in attempts to survive.

• Fight: Responding to danger with confrontation.
• Flight: Escaping or avoiding the threat.
• Freeze: Becoming immobile or “shutting down”
• Fawn: Appeasing or pleasing others to neutralize the danger.

These reactions kept our ancestors safe from predators, but our body does not know the difference between the stress of being chased by a tiger or us being late for a meeting.

The Fight Response

Gennie’s heart pounded as her boss criticized her work in front of her colleagues. Before she could think, she snapped back, her voice sharp and defensive. The anger felt like armor—her body instinctively preparing to confront her perceived”threat” to her dignity.

The fight response floods your body with adrenaline, increasing heart rate and tensing up muscles, as it prepares you to confront a threat head-on. This can even trigger aggression in non-threatening situations.

Signs of Fight Response:

• Anger or irritability
• Clenched fists, teeth, or jaw
• A strong urge to argue, confront, or lash out
• Feeling out of control or hyper-defensive

Getting Yourself Out Of It: Pause and ask yourself:

• “Am I safe right now?”
• “What is my anger trying to protect?”

The Flight Response

Liam felt his chest tighten as the argument between his friends escalated. Instead of speaking up, he grabbed his coat and left the room. His feet carried him out the door before he realized it—running felt safer than dealing with this “nonsense”. 

The flight response involves escaping or running either physically or emotionally to avoid danger. This can also involve avoiding conflict, avoiding relationships, or avoiding emotional vulnerability.

Signs of Flight Response:

• Restlessness or pacing
• Difficulty sitting still or feeling the urge to leave
• Avoiding situations, people, or responsibilities
• Overworking or perfectionism to avoid perceived failure

Getting Yourself Out Of It:

• “What am I afraid of in this moment?”
• “Is avoidance helping me, or is it preventing growth?”

The Freeze Response

During the car accident, Maya gripped the steering wheel, her body locked in place as the sounds of screeching tires surrounded her. She wanted to move, to scream, to do something, but her mind and body froze, as if time itself had stopped.

The freeze response immobilizes you when neither fighting nor flighting is available, often described as feeling “stuck” or numb. It is your attempt to “play dead” to avoid predators.

Signs of Freeze Response:

• Feeling paralyzed, dissociated, or “checked out”
• Difficulty making decisions or taking action
• Emotional numbness or zoning out
• A sense of helplessness

Getting Yourself Out Of It:

• Focus on physical sensations like your feet on the floor or your breath.
• Remind yourself: “I am safe now. I can move through this slowly.”
  Over time, practices like mindfulness and movement (e.g., yoga or stretching) can help release stuck energy.

The Fawn Response

The fawn response involves appeasing or pleasing others to neutralize danger, avoid conflict, criticism, or harm when confrontation is not safe. This can often happen in response to narcissistic abuse, avoid punishment or emotional abandonment. Fawn response is often lead to codependency and exhaustion.

Signs of Fawn Response:

• Difficulty saying “no” or setting boundaries
• Constantly seeking approval or validation
• Suppressing your own needs to make others comfortable
• Feeling emotionally drained from trying to “keep the peace”

Getting Yourself Out of It

• “Am I acting out of fear or genuine care?”
• “What are my needs in this situation?”

Remember, you are not broken—your body and mind adapted to help you survive.

References

1. van der Kolk, B. A. (2014). The body keeps the score: Brain, mind, and body in the healing of trauma. Penguin Books.
2. Schauer, M., & Elbert, T. (2010). Dissociation following traumatic stress: Etiology and treatment. Journal of Psychology, 218(2), 109–127. https://doi.org/10.1027/0044-3409/a000018
3. Porges, S. W. (2007). The polyvagal perspective. Biological Psychology, 74(2), 116–143. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.biopsycho.2006.06.009
4. Levine, P. A. (2015). Healing trauma: A pioneering program for restoring the wisdom of your body. Sounds True.